SAIL IC INBOX

[chickenchoicejudy]

[There is a sick guitar riff on this answering machine message. Why.]

"🎵 Leave me a message after the tone! And I'll get back to you on my cellular phone!
I totally will! I totally will!
I'm not gonna forget I sweaaaa^aaaarrrr--🎵"

[Video/Audio/Text/Etc.]

Comments

during weed party

[inhairently]

did you know about this

🦄😁🏀🏀🏀👏🍕🌮

little pictures

[chickenchoicejudy]

[Ryan is literally at weed party, could totally be told this in person, but he has his communicator out anyway because Min-Gi NEEDS to come get some weed in his lungs. He looks a little surprised when it dings and it's someone else though.]

oh my god WHAT

😎🤩🐣🐣🎸🎵🎶🎤🍪🍪🍞

dude there's SO MANY

lookit this guy!!!!!!

😘

[inhairently]

aren't they cool 😎

🏀👍

eddie showed me

🙀💩👽🦄🦄🥰

[chickenchoicejudy]

is that one a piece of shit with a face???

[Ryan is cracking up across the room. Why is THAT in there?]

🥴🍀🚬🤪🥖

check it out it's everyone here

[inhairently]

huh? its ice cream?

💩💩💩

[ hear that? that's the sound of Steve laughing. maybe the first big, real laugh he's had since he came here. ]

that's pretty good

👁️👃👁️
👄

[chickenchoicejudy]

no no no THIS is ice cream

🍨🍦

both of those are ice cream that other thing is definitely poop

💩💩💩🚽🧻

[This is hysterical, Ryan can't stop laughing. If anyone near him asks he will show them the cursed emojis.]

holy shit its staring at me

👀👋

[inhairently]

dude i worked in an ice cream parlor remember? i think i know what it looks like

💩💩💩

its ice cream with a face

like a mascot

💩🍦🍨🍧🤤👅👅

[chickenchoicejudy]

okay but what kinda ice cream doesn't have a cone OR a bowl? he's naked, man. he's a naked little shit

😳😳😳

oh my god wait wait wait wait waaaaaaaaaait

🎩
💩
👔

[inhairently]

[ several minutes pass before he replies. during these minutes one might hear Arthur's phone rhythmically reciting "pile of faeces" nine times in a row, followed by "shortcake" ]

ok you were right it's shit

why does it have a face ⁉️❓⁉️

💩💩💩

it looks pretty good with the hat

[chickenchoicejudy]

i always knew i was right about literally everything.

the hat makes it look like the most distinguished shit there is

👑
💩

oh wait my bad it was his royal majesty king shitstainington

[inhairently]

[ it is entirely a shame that even after weed, steve isn't the kind of guy to think up things like king shitstainington but at least he can appreciate the esteemed hat + poop combo ]

🎓
💩

what are these even for

🍆🥕🍅🥔💩🚽

wait did i ask that already i don't remember

[chickenchoicejudy]

hahaha I don't remember either man

and i dunno but they're pretty great and i'm gonna use them forever

😎🦁🎪

a couple days after weed party

[inhairently]

hey akagi

can i ask you a question

[chickenchoicejudy]

sure, man! shoot 👉👉

[inhairently]

[ oh god this is super awkward now hmmm maybe this was a bad idea but ]

nice use of the tiny pictures

but yeah cool so do you remember much about when we played never have i ever?

[chickenchoicejudy]

thanks!!

and yeah. I remember most of it actually? it's after that where it all gets kinda wobbly~~~

[From his perspective, Min was helping carry him back to the boat and then he blinked and woke up in Min's bathtub.]

why?

[inhairently]

ok so do you remember when we talked about robin hood and how hot the girl fox is

[ he's in a predicament here where he knows it's absolutely not cool to ask a guy at random if he's not strictly into girls because it's not anyone's business but he really needs to know if ryan isn't strictly into girls ]

[chickenchoicejudy]

[Luckily for Steve, Ryan has very little shame and has already gotten the vibe that this place isn't quite as dangerous to be out in as home.]

...didn't we talk about how they're both hot???

[inhairently]

yeah we did

or you did

so did you mean that?

i swear i'm not trying to be weird. i know it totally looks like i am

[chickenchoicejudy]

[Offline, he squints at his communicator.]

like

did I mean cartoon foxes are hot, or...?

[Honestly there are many layers of things to be embarrassed about from that conversation - you're going to have to be more specific, Steve.]

[inhairently]

what? no

i mean do you really think they're both hot

the girl one AND robin hood

[chickenchoicejudy]

oh

yeah, I do. they're both hot

[An anxious beat between messages, and then a follow up--]

that's not like a problem or anything right?

[inhairently]

[ oh wait oh fuck ]

no! god no sorry dude no it's not a problem

[ there's an even longer anxious beat (more like a series of anxious beats) between messages here ]

i'm asking because i was wondering how you like

you know

figured that out about yourself

[chickenchoicejudy]

oh thank god that would have sucked and probably been extra weird the next time I bummed weed off you

[And, you know. More serious things, but he's incapable of not cracking a joke and trying to cut the tension he made. Especially considering the follow up question.]

hm.

hard to say? I think I kinda always knew but its more like I was always like this and I realized everyone else was different, if that makes sense.

actually that doesn't make any sense lemme try again

it's like. people who like the gender they're "supposed to" don't have to think about it all that hard. and i've never hard to think about it that hard. But that doesn't line up with the world and then sometimes the world is shitty about it

you know what no I know how I figured it out

i saw star wars at the movies and watched harrison ford and carrie fisher on screen at the same for two hours when I was eleven. that did it

forward-dated to December 24th

[inhairently]

[ at some point on the evening of the 24th, if ryan returns to his room he'll find a small package just outside the door. it contains a tommy bahama brand candle. sort of. it's been decoupaged to hell and back with pages from different 8-track booklets (OBVIOUSLY lady gaga is on there) and someone's painstakingly dug the candle out of the tin and replaced it with a little bit of weed.

attached is a note:

Hey Akagi -

Thought you might appreciate this

Merry Christmas

- Steve ]